Footnoted goes to the dogs!

April 1, 2011

 

We’re chest deep in proxies today (really, all week) and even with both the brain behind footnoted and the baby working around the clock, Sonya, Theo and me are still not really managing to keep up with all of the filings that are coming in. Rather than outsourcing to India, where Morningstar has a growing operation, or perhaps Chile, which has been making a major push over the past few years to be the next major outsourcing hub for American companies, we’ve decided to try something different.

So starting today, we’re going to begin working with several great animal rescue organizations including Paws Chicago, New York Pet Rescue, and the Soi Dog Foundation (all of which are great organizations to donate to) to train dogs waiting for adoption to read SEC filings. Many of these dogs are bored, sitting in kennels all day as they wait to be adopted (another great thing to consider doing, if you’re thinking of adding a canine companion to your life) and there’s no reason why they can’t be given cheap laptops, access to WiFi and put to work. Kumara, who has perfected the ability to read SEC filings and munch on raw chicken feet at the same time will be Vice President in Charge of Training.

Granted, there will be a lot more poop to pick up, but given some of the — how do we say this politely? — crap that we see in the filings of publicly traded companies, we’re already kind of inured to picking up lots of poop! In fact, you might even say we’re specialists! There’s also the fact that dogs are often a lot more reasonable (and for the most part, easier to train) than their human counterparts. And even though Kumara gets organically raised raw food (which costs a small fortune) it’s still a lot cheaper than the typical business lunch.

Maybe this new turn for footnoted will even prompt companies to start their own dog policies. After all, Google (GOOG) used to have one (there’s an archive here though the live link doesn’t seem to work any longer). It’s not clear if the policy is still in place though.

If you think this April Fool’s Day joke, was lame, here’s some others that we found funny:

Happy April Fool’s Day from all of us here at footnoted!

In all seriousness, the flow of filings are pretty intense. We’re posting our best finds over on footnotedPro. If you’re interested in finding out more, contact us at pro@footnoted.com for more details.

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